into His harvest

Well i am here in Cambodia and loving it.  I wake up to the sounds of honking horns, yelling men, construction right outside my window, a man yelling into a megaphone that sounds like he has his nose plugged, dogs fighting, men talking on our balcony, a jet propeller for a fan, rain on the tin roof, and the sounds of playing kids. The second we walk outside our door we are greeted by little Khmer kids yelling HELLO at the top of their lungs and delicious smells in the air. I have seen the hearts of my team come alive as they fall in the love with this place. That the Lord has so orchestrated this crew to excel in each of their strengths, to grow and challenge each other, and walk out their passions, to go lower so they can see the others go higher. So overall it has been amazing. We focus on the long term vision here, to see more souls saved and what it looks like to live a life after christ. So we work with slums, restoration homes, cafe ministries and also teaching children the bible and english. We have seen lives transform in the 12 short days that we have been here and are continuing to see souls more and more hungry for the Lord. To dive into the Khmer culture but to also bring Kingdom Culture to this place. I have see my team and myself in the culture of the kingdom. Which leads me to inform you on my journey so far, these are just the rough ideas and i do not really know how to put them into language or connect them fully yet. I am still asking the Lord for the big picture, bear with me. So, here we go.....

only these few great years on the planet you have the opportunity of loving him without seeing him and you will never have it again, you will never have the opportunity in sickness to worship, you will never have the opportunity with sin all around you to choose him, you'll never have the opportunity with circumstances that are difficult to look to him to make it better! Because in all of eternity there will be no sickness, in all of eternity there will be no sin, in all of eternity there will be no temptation, only now do we have the high honor that humanity has to worship him, love him, choose him, get consumed by Him; while being surrounded by sin and the option to run after other lovers! We will never have it again.

before this revelation of the love of god, i was dead works, it was me trying to look the part and sound and act the part, i was trying to earn my salvation and that is not salvation at all, it was me trying to clothe myself in my own righteous deeds. When i did DTS i got emerged in His love and my unworthiness. My depravity, but oh his love his overwhelming love. That he loved me before i ever loved him. He loves me when i spit in His face, He loves me when i was embarrassed to call myself a christian, He loves me in my greatest moment of shame, He loves me in my moment of my 17th rededication to Him, He loves me every moment in between the same. and i am awestruck by the love of god. 

the love that overflows out of my heart is a response to the revelation of His love

the lord is teaching me about his love and about how this is not about performance, it about acting out of full surrender to Him and being obedient and even in my defiance he still loves me. That the answer to every question i ask him is "because i love you" and when i ask why do you love me he says "i love you because i love you because i love you because i love you". 


to be so undone by his simple love.